I have just about dragged myself into the office this morning, completely unwillingly and feeling very much like the only place I need to be right now is in bed.
I have had a brilliant weekend, I've seen lots of old faces and realised just how much I miss them all. I did my best to keep it fairly healthy... until I got drunk and forgot I was on a diet. Anyway, I bought Weight Watchers curry supplies for curry night on Friday and shamelessly picked at everyone else's plates for the entire evening - there is nothing on this earth like Dilshad chips - if you don't know, get to know!
Saturday was a pretty good day, low point lunch, no snacking and a three course meal which, as meals go, probably wasn't too unhealthy. It was probably the copious amounts of vodka that started my downfall. Sunday morning came and, diet or no diet, the hangover munchies got me. And they continued to get me for pretty much the whole day. I had everything that I shouldn't have and I'm too embarrassed to specify but a visit to the golden arches and later on a 'Delivery!' at the front door might give you an idea. I don't feel at all guilty and am quite prepared to sit aboard the wagon again and start again from where I fell off.
The only downside to this weekend, is a certain pair of b*stards I came across on Saturday night. To set the scene, we have two guys who, thankfully for my sanity I didn't bother looking at, stood outside a bar apparently doing nothing. I am walking past in a single file line with my good friend 'Chew', who is a leggy blonde and quite the fittie in front of me, and in front of her, two other girls. I don't know what made the voices of these two guys stand out above everyone else's, and I wish it hadn't but I heard it loud and clear... 'You, yes you, definitely you... eurgh not you!' and they break down in hysterics. I don't have to spell it out but, caught up in having a good time, I momentarily forgot that I was the fat friend.
How. Fucking. Humiliating. Within a millisecond I am taken back to every single time I've been made to feel bad by someone who doesn't even know me for being big. Having 'Fat bitch!' screamed at me from someone driving past in a car (I know, right?), the regular look of what is he doing with that when I've been with a guy. Not much comes close to making someone feel as low as these comments can.
Of course it only inspires me to lose this weight. But it makes sick that I feel like I have to in order to avoid the judgement of scum like that.
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